keep swimmin'

2010-01-04T18:59:00.002+08:00

i've not blogged in a long long time.

but this is worth blogging.

spent half my day listening to uehara and corea and i feel like i should never touch that instrument again.

injustice

2009-09-21T23:05:00.000+08:00

food glorious food

what comfort i find in thee.

(damn it)

2009-09-08T22:08:00.003+08:00

best pillow ever :]

2009-08-25T23:31:00.000+08:00

i will bloom. i will bloom i will bloom.
gotta bloom faster. bloom faster. bloom faster.

2009-08-06T22:58:00.002+08:00

P E T C H

SAJC 08S12's hunky thai ladies man

"you'll always be in our hearts"

enjoy the USA

miss us!

2009-07-27T22:44:00.002+08:00

Leisure

What is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare?—

No time to stand beneath the boughs,

And stare as long as sheep and cows:

No time to see, when woods we pass,

Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:

No time to see, in broad daylight,

Streams full of stars, like skies at night:

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,

And watch her feet, how they can dance:

No time to wait till her mouth can

Enrich that smile her eyes began?

A poor life this if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare.

W. H. Davies

2009-07-15T23:18:00.003+08:00

on the long way up the dreaded hill to tuition i had a compulsion to stare up at the sky.

for some reason i just stood there and stared.

the clouds parted and

it's vastness just overwhemled me.

it left me with a feeling.

a feeling that has yet to subside.

i long to watch a sunset.

to sit and smell grass.

to watch clouds pass.

in the warmest embrace

reassuring, simply comforting

security

i need security

to know that in spite of life and all it's 'unpredictability'

i'm heading to a place where i'll be able to

watch a sunset

sit and smell grass

in the warmest embrace

reassuring, comforting

it's vastness, Your vastness

enveloped me

reminded me

i felt you

and with all my heart i thank You.

2009-06-29T22:28:00.004+08:00

Is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
Is that alright?
If you don't shoot it how am I supposed to hold it
Is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
Is that alright, yeah, with you?

bang?

2009-06-23T23:49:00.003+08:00

i approached it with fear.
there was nothing awfully frightening about it.
maybe it was because it was my first time?
the unknown always has a way with tinkling with our emotions, no?

i was told it was enjoyable
and beneficial.
somehow, i doubted the extent of this supposed pleasure that was to be derived.
'simply rejuvenating'
it seemed pretty simple.
there was nothing complicated about it.
no extensive instructions, no profound machinery.
yet, it was it's sheer simplicity that made me suspicious of the perks it boasted.

after considerble contemplation,
i decided 'what the heck',
i'm probably gonna do it someday,
might as well have a go now.

and so, with hesitation
and excitment,
i tore open the packet of my first face mask.

boy, did it feel good.

look out world. a new tai tai is in the making.

2009-06-03T23:16:00.001+08:00

look what i found!

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

apparently she's existed for a long long time!

2009-05-29T21:45:00.000+08:00

i still love you :]

2009-05-23T22:11:00.006+08:00

My beloved perckies and string bass,

(not forgetting jacob who unfortunately is not in the wonderful section pic above)

And of course of not forgetting my batchmates... :]

the stage is set, the lights are dimmed

the audience hold their breath

let's make this count

let's make this work

let's make music

and a wonderful memory :]

Thank you Father for blessing us with this opportunity :]

GO! SA(JCCB) GO SA(JCCB) GO!

2009-05-08T14:22:00.003+08:00

missing instruments terribly more than i thought i would.

and yesterday will be remembered as a lovely memory :]

Thank you SAJCCB for granting me the chance to make such beautiful music with you.

SAINTS OLE!

2009-05-03T23:31:00.002+08:00

Thank you for getting the tix!!!

Cats was awesome.

The Run Tum Tugger was

simply

a dream. sigh...

2009-04-10T22:44:00.001+08:00

loved the akwardness of it all.

i like seeing ppl all uncomfortable.

muahahahaha

2009-02-26T22:31:00.002+08:00

it's as simple as black and white

and i cant live without it.

2009-02-15T01:36:00.007+08:00

...mean love.

2009-01-31T22:59:00.002+08:00

i wanna buy time.

2009-01-26T00:19:00.002+08:00

i'm getting upset on purpose

at least it feels like i am

what's wrong with me?
it's like i convinced myself this reaction is only expected and proper and hence i have to feel this way.

i'm even more upset with myself than anything else.

does it go back to when i found that i didn have the reaction i expected when you broke the news to me?

i highly doubt so but i cant think of anything else and it bothers me greatly

i wanna know why. i needa know why

am i stronger than i think i am? can i not accept the possiblity that i'm capable enough?
is there a part of me that begs to feel this way for fear that i'll be completely indifferent one day and all this that means so much now would mean absolutely nothing in the future?

i dont have a clue what's going on inside of me.

'cept that it's killing me

2009-01-19T22:15:00.002+08:00

To escape to a place no one has hear of.

In a time no one knows.

you'll be alone without a care in the world soaking up the sun, the breeze, the sweet aroma of nature's finest.

to have no one who has a single clue about your whereabouts.

I have an urge.

I want that.

2009-01-16T23:59:00.003+08:00

My neighbour's house

My street

All done by my friendly neighbours on the kampung like street i live on.

guess chinese new years coming round the corner.

gong xi fa chai
and
xue ye jin bu everyone!

2009-01-09T01:32:00.004+08:00

Most thanks to God for answering my prayer. it is the best gift ever. :)

i prayed a prayer that went something like this a coupla months back:

"Dear Father in heaven, i'm tired of knowing that ppl love each other. i'm tired of knowing You love me. i've felt You before. but that was a long time before. what happened? i dont want to know anymore, i want to feel..."

my prayer was answered to its fullest.

i got to feel not only His love but yours too,

through you.

it's been a eons since i've felt this way.

-blissful :)

thank you.

thank you so so so mcuh.

everything everyone did has contributed much to the most fabulous birthday ever.
i've never felt so grateful, so comforted.

thank you.

i love you.

so much.

dedicated to all my loved ones.

2009-01-06T22:57:00.002+08:00

thank you joshua, grace, uly, phy and adidi :)

i love you all.

you made me feel really good today.

loved the jap food, enjoyed the movie (adam sandler rocks my socks), the dory fish was scrumptious, the cake was heavenly and chillin at ice3 will be something i'll rmb :)

every moment of today makes me wanna thank God for placing such wonderful friends in my life.

i can't tell you how fortunate, blessed and grateful i feel now.

i'm also feeling extremly happy right now.

am gonna marinate in this moment.

LOVE YOU ALL SO SO MUCH!

2009-01-04T23:18:00.003+08:00

This is a present my cousin gave me.
My dear cousin who loves me so much that he spells my name the way i like it.

I'm not for real.

2009-01-01T13:18:00.002+08:00

you blink

a year passes by

you reminisce

Father, last year was a year filled with trials and tribulations and yet you have have delivered me so faithfully.
Some of my short life's low points have this year to thank for making possible
but
i rejoice
for they have only thought me how much i need You, how much i want You

Father i need You.
i want You.

As this year begins, i pray you continue to guide me
i pray you use me as you will.

May i forever be a child after Your heart.

I Love You.

Heavenly Father

i call out Your name

for i know you are the only shelter i can seek in this rain

Your word lights my way

as your grace brings we through

Here i stand Father, i need You

2008-12-25T17:09:00.001+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!

My first true love,
i'm forever grateful for all You've done for me and
simply
for who You are.

i celebrate You today
and i pray
that i may
with all my loved ones
forever more.

merry christmas one and all :)

2008-12-16T21:53:00.002+08:00

OMG! NEW STUFF?!?!

Let's celebrate!

Drum cake anyone?

2008-11-18T01:37:00.003+08:00

i am yet again reminded of the song my blog's named after.

and now of the things she said to me.

they reminded me of how i felt.

i wanna swim away but dont know how

so help me.

2008-10-27T12:10:00.002+08:00

' you bleed just to know you're alive '

it's sick how pain makes you fell alive
and how pleasure makes you fell like you're 'walking on air' and 'out of this world'

it's sad isnt it.

how people have concluded that life in this world hurts.

2008-10-26T21:54:00.002+08:00

Thank you God for helping me improve in all of my subjects :)
and also for bringing me through most of PW :) :)

2008-09-29T23:07:00.002+08:00

thank you Father for bringing me through promos. :)

i could never have gone through it without You!

now here's a question that's been on my mind every now and then:

is it better to love or be loved?

(a friend of mine told me her mom said it'she better to be loved and that got me wondering.)

2008-09-21T16:34:00.002+08:00

Heavenly Father,
i call out Your name
for i know You are the only shelter i can seek in this rain
Your word lights my way and
Your grace brings me through

here i stand, Father, i need You

i need You more
than anything on earth
'cus only You Lord
can bring me through the worst

You're my comforter
my counsellor
my strength when i am weak
You bring peace and joy and
Your perfect love
brings hope when all seems bleak.

so now i lift my hands
i surrender all i am
i need You.

it's aptly titled 'i need You'

not my best but i've been breathing these three words the recent past of my life and i just had to get something out. enjoy.

2008-09-13T22:38:00.002+08:00

love labour's lost was throughly entertaining.

it was a pleasure watching full grown men with respectable status (of which one is of a king) fall in love and are subject to the mercy of charming and very much witty ladies. (my fav is rosaline :) sorry princess)

props to the actors/actresses who took on the roles of Berowne, Rosaline, The Princess of France, Costard, Don Armado and Moth.

interesting little 'fact'! : the actress who played mercade is Ms Zhou's (evil) twin!

interesting little fact! (2) : The role of mercade was intended for a male actor.

anyways, my apprehensions about watching shakespeare that i've not studied have been dispelled today. well maybe only when it come to the ones lighter at heart.

so here's leaving you with my fav verses of the day.

adieu.

Love Labour's Lost - Act 1 Scene (II)

ADRIANO DE ARMADO
I will hereupon confess I am in love: and as it is

base for a soldier to love, so am I in love with a

base wench. If drawing my sword against the humour

of affection would deliver me from the reprobate

thought of it, I would take Desire prisoner, and

ransom him to any French courtier for a new-devised

courtesy. I think scorn to sigh: me

thinks I should

outswear Cupid. Comfort, me, boy: what great men

have been in love?

MOTH
Hercules, master.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Most sweet Hercules! More authority, dear boy, name

more; and, sweet my child, let them be men of good

repute and carriage.

MOTH
Samson, master: he was a man of good carriage, great

carriage, for he carried the town-gates on his back

like a porter: and he was in love.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
O well-knit Samson! strong-jointed Samson! I do

excel thee in my rapier as much as thou didst me in

carrying gates. I am in love too. Who was Samson's

love, my dear Moth?

MOTH
A woman, master.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Of what complexion?

MOTH
Of all the four, or the three, or the two, or one of the four.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Tell me precisely of what complexion.

MOTH
Of the sea-water green, sir.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Is that one of the four complexions?

MOTH
As I have read, sir; and the best of them too.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Green indeed is the colour of lovers; but to have a

love of that colour, me

thinks Samson had small reason

for it. He surely affected her for her wit.

MOTH
It was so, sir; for she had a green wit.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
My love is most immaculate white and red.

MOTH
Most maculate thoughts, master, are masked under such colours.

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Define, define, well-educated infant.

MOTH
My father's wit and my mother's tongue, assist me!

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO
Sweet invocation of a child; most pretty and

pathetical!

MOTH
If she be made of white and red,

Her faults will ne'er be known,

For blushing cheeks by faults are bred

And fears by pale white shown:

Then if she fear, or be to blame,

By this you shall not know,

For still her cheeks possess the same

Which native she doth owe.

A dangerous rhyme, master, against the reason of

white and red.

DON

2008-09-08T23:49:00.003+08:00

thank you august for the puzzle. i finished cus i was desperate for entertainment when i got stuck at home. thank you cheryl for helping me with it. especiallly with the border:) anyways. it has successfully distracted my from my studies. haha.

p/s it appears landscape on my com

p/p/s does everyone really start with the borders first when they do a puzzle?

2008-09-05T21:39:00.002+08:00

this is a public service annoucement.

beware fellow eastpakers ( and other backpackers) of PICKPOCKETS!

i was carrying my nice little eastpak shopping around 'made with love' in PS when this girl bumped into me.
the place was really crowded so i thought nothing about it.
browsed a little..
'oooh.. pretty buttons...'
*bump*
same girl. even felt a tug at my lovely bag.
still didn think anything about it.
in fact i apologised cus my bag was kinda big and i though i was obstructing the way.
so i went on browsing...

out of the store cheryl goes "oh, your bag's open! wait. wheres your wallet?"

darn.

i have fallen victim to a juvenile pickpocket today. it is the 5th of sep. it is an omnimous date.

so we went back to the store to view surveillence and the cctv's didn catch the face of that girl with long straight rebonded hair in a dark red top/dress. (i didn notice. cus io didn know she took my most favourite wallet in the whole wide world!!!!!)

here's what makes me sad:
1) it's the best wallet EVER
2) all i've got in terms of cash is in it. ( i withdrew all i had to have a goodtime with jan and co. :( what i great time we ended up having)
3) my keys are in it. ( my parents will have to spend money changing the locks and all)
4) the heart aunt ivy folded is in it. (it's really good encouragement)
5) some low class juvenile took it and i apologised on her behalf apperently.

so here's warning you. dont put valuable in the front pocket of your backpack!

at the end of it all, i would like to say i love you janice and cheryl so much :)
thanks for helping me out today.
it was supposed to be all happy and good but an idiot kinda had to go spoil it.
and thank you shop keeper lady. you're a very kinda soul.
and thank you the guy at the shop. thank you for offering free drinks and for the free sugar rolls with hearts and icing :) plus, youre kinda cute so you definitely made waiting for the shopkeeper lady to get back to us about the cctv a little better.

anyways, i'd like to stress again DO NOT PUT VALUABLES IN THE FRONT POCKET OF YOUR BACKPACK YOU BACKPACK CARRYING PPL. BEWARE THE CHILDISH PICKPOCKETS!

2008-09-03T17:49:00.002+08:00

Othello

Think on thy sins.

Desdemona

They are loves i bear to you.

Othello

Ay, and for that thou diest.

Looking forward to Love Labour's Lost :)

2008-09-01T22:31:00.002+08:00

to sum up today in one word:

wasted. say "awww.. what a pity."

looking forward to thursday's date though :)

hey there fello bimboob

2008-08-24T23:11:00.003+08:00

went to study with garce and uly today:)

pretty productive overall.

during one of our little talks in between our intensive studying they mentioned i had really funny testimonials in my friendster account. they could even quote some! my goodness did i laugh my heart out. i couldnt even rmb reading such testimonials!
haha.

sOmE wErE wRitTeN lIkE tHaT
annd some were witten lyke that worx.

hahaha.

freaking hilarious.

we've all come a long way friends.
a superlong way.

i'm glad.
relieved.
and glad:)

yet sad that i've distanced from some of these friends who were really good and close friends of mind. wonder how you guys are doing.

yet glad too that i'm still pretty close to some other of these friends.
really heart warming:)

well, here's to FRIENDS:)

LOVE YOU GUYS! mUaCkX!!!

2008-08-20T23:06:00.002+08:00

it's pretty unbelievable how foolish i feel.

been trying to think all of it through rationally.
organise my thoughts and emotions.
figure out what this really perculiar and never before felt feeling is really but i'm afraid.

i'm terrified.

fortified.

i'm a wimp who's afriad to face up to her own self.
this tomfoolery.
i'm gonna do my head sooner or later.

p.s. i'm betting my money on sooner.

2008-08-12T22:55:00.001+08:00

just keep swimming

just keep swimming

2008-08-10T14:13:00.001+08:00

i'm sorry.

please tell me what's wrong?

2008-08-04T00:20:00.002+08:00

i hate these bouts of inferiority haunting me every now and then.

i've struggled with loving myself for the longest time possible and based on recent observations, i seem to be losing this damned war.

why can't i see myself as the Lord my God sees me?
as precious, important, beautiful and with a great purpose?

i'm drifting.
into a deep dark ravine.
beyond the point of no return?
guess there's no such thing
but sometimes it feels like i've fallen so far it'll take a life time just to go back to ground zero.

i'm loosing my grip.
i feel myself slipping.
worst of all i feel powerless.

again, i feel myself on standing on the edge of the world on my tippy toes, wondering why i try so hard to keep my balance while i wait for the slightest breeze to give that last gentle shove.

bring me back?
you can try
but nothing in this world's ever guaranteed.

2008-07-25T23:18:00.003+08:00

received the latest edition of TIME in my mailbox today.

it's cover really caught my attention.

it got me wondering...

the way Liu Xiang is captured..

it's pretty poweful.

why choose to portray him in such a light?

hmm..

2008-07-15T22:33:00.001+08:00

angry at myself for being angry.

never knew i was such an angry person.

it's devastatingly disappointing.

2008-06-28T23:19:00.002+08:00

Beautiful Lord, Wonderful Saviour
I know for sure, all of my days are
held in your hands, crafted into your perfect plan

You gently call me into your presence
guiding me by Your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through Your eyes

I'm captured by
Your holy calling
Set me apart,
I know you're drawing me to yourself
Lead me Lord I pray

Take me, Mould me,
use me, fill me
I give my life to the Potter's hand
Call me, guide me,
lead me, walk beside me
I give my life to the Potter's hand

you gentlly call me into your presence
guidin me by your holy spirit
teach me dear lord to live all of my life through your eyes

i'm captured by you holy calling
set me apart, I know your drawing me to yourself
lead me lord i pray

Dear Lord,

Thank you.

Ever so much :)

With much Love,

your princess.

2008-06-20T00:13:00.002+08:00

wish it were so simple.
wish i could just let it all out.
maybe some day.
dont count on that day being anytime soon though.
but you could wish.
just like me.
just like how i'm living on wishes.
i wish.

2008-06-17T11:45:00.002+08:00

i'm sorry.

please dont feel useless.
you're definitely not useless.
youre one of the most useful ppl i know!

i'll get over my fears.
i promise i will.
not sure how soon though.

but i'll try my best.

with you around,
i know i'll have it that much easier.

i thank you.
i applaude you.
for being who you are.

i dont know what it's gonna be like
but heres to the future.
one with more smiles.

2008-06-16T22:04:00.001+08:00

i dont know how to say this but do you think you could stop treating me special?

treat me like any other friend.

please.

it's tempting me to run away.

forgive me.

2008-06-10T23:20:00.001+08:00

i believe in miracles.
i believe in you.

2008-06-09T21:30:00.003+08:00

tell my again why i haven moved out?

you dont tell someone "i trust you but..."
that isnt trusting anymore.

wish i could stay in australia forever.

the 10 days were pretty good i guess.

made friends which is always a good thing :)

2008-05-24T23:47:00.001+08:00

cheers to a blissful, beautiful wedding.

2008-05-23T10:10:00.000+08:00

shit. i'm starting to worry.

2008-05-19T14:48:00.002+08:00

hope whoever went yesterday was entertained.

dont feel like typing much so heres a song..

Britt Nicole - When she cries

Little girl terrified
She'd leave her room if only bruises would heal
A home is no place to hide
Her heart is breaking from the pain that she feels

[CHORUS]
Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries

Today she's turning 16
Everyone singing, but she can't seem to smile
They never get past arms length
How could they act like everything is alright?
She's pulling down her long sleeves
To cover all the memories that scars leave
She says, "maybe making me bleed will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"

[CHORUS]

This is the dark before the dawn
The storm before the peace
Don't be afraid 'cause seasons change and
God is watching over you
He hears you

Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries
Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries

i thank God for you.

2008-05-12T23:53:00.000+08:00

missed me?

2008-05-09T00:42:00.003+08:00

It made me smile.
thanks :)

Smile

E A E
I met you when I was young
A E
you saw me
A E
but today , you're my bestie
A C
whom I can trust
A E
thank you lord, for wonderful friends
A C
that I .. depend

E
Yea

E
I saw you
A E
you filled me up
A
you were there
E
helped me up
E
and sewed my wounds
Aminor C
which I couldnt bear

Aminor E
you've been there for me
A E A
but when you cried it hurt my heart
A C
would you just smile
E
SMILE

Chorus:
A E
Smile in the darkest days
A E
Even in rain
A E
Smile in chinese class
A E
Even Though She 's Mad
A E
Won't you smile when you're sad
A E
and wont you smile for free
A E
So Smile, Smile like the Sun (x3)

2008-05-06T23:01:00.002+08:00

heal the world
make it a better place
for YOU and for ME and the entire human race.

i'll always be trying to make things better.

2008-05-05T22:22:00.001+08:00

is this the end?

is this how you want it to end?

2008-05-04T23:03:00.002+08:00

hey, its not your fault.

it really isnt.

it has never been.

dont think it ever will be.

i'm sorry.

i really am.

like from deep down inside.

yeah, i wish things things dont have to be this way.

i really dont.

youre a really nice person.

like one of the best, most sincere person i know.

no where near being a jerk.

so never say that about yourself.

ever.

please.

its just timing i guess.

well heres to better times.

2008-05-01T22:31:00.002+08:00

happy labour day everyone!

got to go out today :)

like omg.
i never knew the world missed me so much.
the birds chirped their 'hello's and the trees waved their 'good day's and indeed, it was a pretty good day :)

met cheryl at dg close to 1? (though we we supposed to met at 12. we're such punctual ppl!)
cheryl's been spending quite abit so we decided to save some cash and relive our secondary school days and had ljs for lunch.
enjoyed the fries :)
there was this like really persistent and irritating noise that everyone chose to kinda ignore but it was really bugging so we left shortly after we filled our stomachs.

proceeded to starbucks and cheryl bought the largest cup of green tea latte i'd ever seen for me. it was like absolutely huge. thanks girl :) she got a huge java chip frap. her usual.
we tried to be good hardworking students. we tried. we really did. oh well.
anyways, while tryin, a tourist from china (a really sweet lady) asked us for directions to clarke quay , the merlion park and the NUS campus. (you must be thinking 'NUS campus? who visits a school on a free and easy holiday?' at least i was thinking that way.
anyways, she's from china right? so yes, she asked in chinese and gosh were cheryl and i so darn embarrassed after that! we did our best giving directions in chinese but man was it obvious we were really bad at our own mother tongue. thankfully she understood us. i think.
so, like giving directions in our very own version of chinese isnt enough, the sweet lady went on to start a conversation with us about how we find our education system here in singapore. (turns out she's a teacher which explains the interest in NUS)
Man, did cheryl and i have a ball of a time having thoughts run through our head in dual sound. We felt even more embarrassed after that.
all right girl, we have to brush up on our mother tongue! it was pretty fun talking to the sweet lady anyhow.

oh, we saw like the funniest butt crack. like i have no idea why it's so funny. it just is. and cheryl made me take a picture. sick girl. haha.

we ended up watching videos and checking out people's pics online. hee. we're so nosey.
oh, and neither of us finished our drinks.

decided to have ajisen for dinner. (my virgin ajisen experience btw)
took a short detour before.
detour part (1): went to yamaha to see cheyl'd new piano. man does it sound good. when cheryl pointed out the price to me all i could say was 'oh'. i would say its pretty worth it though.
detour part (2): went to daiso after. and cheryl spent $36 dollars on food!
we didn get a basket at first so i was balancing everyting on a file i had using my chin to keep the stuff on top from falling! i reminded myself of the rat in cinderella that took too much cheese! it was absolutely ridiculous. too bad we didn take a picture. cheryl was so kind as to get a basket :) the plastic bag to put the food in sure was huge.

finally made it to ajisen and we discovered there was quite a long queue. thankgoodness it was a pretty fast queue.
the food was pretty good i guess.
thanks cheryl for reconmending the charsiew!
oh, the portion was huge! again, neither of us finished our food. hee.
oh oh, while we were having dinner...

cheryl: (suddenly, with a very worried look on her face) 'help me! help me!'
me: (panicking)'what? whats wrong?'
cheryl: 'look! look!'

i looked. and looked. and finally i saw what she was panicking about.
she had kicked a tile of the wall and couldn move her foot for if she did the tile would fall to the floor and possibly break with a crash!
i couldn help myself but burst out into roaring laughter. haha.
it was darn hilarious. you would laugh so hard your tummy would camp if you were there.

shopped abit before going home.
it wasnt a very 'eventful' day but it sure was a breather :)
thanks cheryl for spending the day with me :)

its a damn long post but you've reached the end. congratulations.

p.s. thinking about it, it was a pretty huge day, the huge latte and frp, the huge plastic bag of food, the huge ajisen meal and come to think of it, the butt crack was pretty huge too. :P

2008-04-28T21:11:00.002+08:00

you're right

i would nvr have guessed.

i mean,

u hand-made a bracelet!!

i'm like really touched.

truly truly touched and appreciative.

want you to know you been a really great friend :]

and i hope things stay that way.

as friends?

hope you're not thinking of anything more.

i would drift so far we would eventually stop talking.

and it'll be because of my own fear.

and well, i dont want that to happen.

s0..

dont fall in love with me!

2008-04-24T18:10:00.002+08:00

missed school today.

so darn happy.

ha.

was in the doctor's office feeling the cold of the air con
waiting for the buzzer to beep
and the LCD above the consultation room's door to flash the number '32'
when the headline of a magazine article (the kind you always find in a clinic) caught my eye.

"IF YOU HAD ONE MORE YEAR TO LIVE"

how apt considering you go to the doctor's hoping to recover from whatever ailment it is that you're suffering from.

anyways, it got me thinking.
what WOULD I do if i had one more year to live?

sure i'd want world peace, to save the hungry children in Africa, eliminate poverty, save all people from condemnation but if i were living in this screwed of world of ours, what would i do?
well here's what i've come up with so far:

1. quit school. (there's no need for elaboration is there?)
now that i've quit school i'd have more time to
2. pay more attention to my friends :]
3. put in more effort in making the people around me happy
4. write more songs.
5. record my songs.
6. perform my songs
7. keep a proper journal. (the paper pad i'm using wont last long)
8. raise money for charities while doing all that.
9. learn to
10. fall
11. in
12. love
13. again

cus i think i deserve to have someone love me whole heartedly.
to show me care and affection.
to offer me a sense of security.
to romance me.
its selfish i know.
i mean, i'm gonna die in a year but can you blame a girl for wanting all that?

'the potter and his vase'

one day a potter decides to create the best vase he'll ever make.
its takes him years of sweat, blood and tears.
he puts in all he's got all his emotion, all his time, all of him.
he commits himself to its creation that the process becomes a part of him.
a gd productive day would put him in high spirits
and a tiny mistake would get him down.
but he'll tell himself to incorporate that mistake and make the vase even better then it was before.
his effort paid off and he created the most elaborate, most exquisite vase anyone in the world had ever seem
everyone said that it would last forever and would go down in history.
one day, as he was polishing the vase, it slipped, fell to the ground and broke into a billion pieces with a loud thundering crash.
at first he stood there in shock. mouth ajar as he stared at what used to be his most prized possesion.
he picked up the pieces and it cut him. he wasnt bothered about the pain or the bleeding.
all he wanted was to salvage all he could of the vase and hopefully piece it back together.
he work day in day out, praying every night before he slept and morning he awoke that he'll be able to piece it back together.
sadly, the material of which the vase was made of didn allow the potter to repair the vase.
he cried. for a whole year he hurt in memory of that vase which took all of him to make. slowly but surely, he got over the broken vase. convincing himself that at least the vase had came to be even if it didn last as long as he had hoped (which was forever).
he told himself that it was all right as at least the world once saw what he was capable of.
still, the potter never made another vase so exquisite, so carefully thought out, so carefully made. people wondered why but soon understood.

he could never handle the possibility of a 2nd blow.

2008-04-17T23:30:00.002+08:00

A dedication to the people who care. :)

The Gift Of Friends
by Karin Schaefer

There are days when
bubbling from us comes
the innocent child within,
who giggles at the little things
and wears a silly grin.

There are days when
melancholy comes to
visit for a while;
the mind feels tired, the body weak;
we have no strength to smile.

There are days when
joy abundant
grabs a hold of you and me;
wraps us up in all it's splendor,
lifts us up and sets us free.

There are days when
sorrow wraps us
in its cloak of grief and fear,
'till our hearts ache to the breaking,
'till our eyes can't shed a tear.

There are days when
love bestows us
with its wonderment and light;
with its beauty and its mystery,
its power and its might.

And there are days when
life rewards us
and seems to make amends
by granting us a marvelous gift,
the precious gift of Friends.

2008-04-08T22:05:00.000+08:00

the bruises are starting to show..

its hurts to just look at em.

2008-04-04T23:00:00.002+08:00

before i go on, i would like to thank God for answering a very impt prayer.

now, i wonder what you think of me sometimes.
did you really think i wouldnt be happy about something i prayed so hard for coming through?
fyi, its quite insulting.

2008-04-04T01:35:00.002+08:00

an ode to the song my blog was named after.

mad - check
angry - check
callous - check (could afford to be more)
lost - check
confused - cheak
cheap - check
used - cheak
unfaithful - check

looks like my life's checked out.

2008-04-01T00:37:00.002+08:00

last night.

tossed and turned.
then tossed and turned again.
finally..
drifted off into a sweet slumber.
i saw her.
heard her.
i swear it seemed all too real.
i started believing in it.
agreed to go over to visit her.
as i was making my way..
something stirred and i awoke.
reality bit me.
it bit me real hard.
she'd gone.
and she'd never be back.
i miss her.
i miss her so much.
the rest of the night and the following day
devoted,
to thoughts of her.
sweet thoughts,
loving thoughts.
my mama (maternal grandmother)
forever remembered as the bubbly and cute character she was.

i love you, mama.

2008-03-29T21:52:00.002+08:00

this i cant blame on my absent mindedness.

screwed up really bad this time.

i'm really sorry.

i just hope you'll still be comfortable talking to me freely about just about anything.

i did the one thing i made myself promise myself over and over again i wouldnt do and i'm really disappointed with myself.

i'm really sorry.

i dont know what i was thinking.

at the looks of it i wasn even thinking.

i'm so sorry.

i really am.

i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm sorry
i'm so so sorry.

cross my heart i'll never do something like that to you ever again.

2008-03-28T22:46:00.002+08:00

this was supposed to be a light hearted post about my blonde moments #3 and 4.
(one of them being me filling a biurette without switching off the tap at the end. yes. it all ended up on the floor.)
(oh, and yes. i was totally oblivious until a friend of mine went "Dorita!" and pointed to the floor)

however due to an unfortunate turn of events, i'm not in the mood to write a light heared post or about the terrific time i had yesterday with the pillowman.

all i wanna do is find out when i'll ever be good enough or you.

2008-03-27T00:00:00.002+08:00

Blonde moment #1

"ring!"

crap.
school's started.
ohwell.
should make my way to class soon.
now..
where was class again?
damn.
wheres my timetable?
urgh..
ok.
i think it was block H.
yes.
thats right.
block H.

(makes way to where she thinks block H is...)

eh?
somethings not right.
i dont recognise anyone in any of the classes here.

(starts looking around desperately.)
(wouldnt want to be late for class!)
(after a while of looking..)
(spots sign saying 'block C'.)
(slaps herself on forehead and quickly makes her way to the right class.)

Blonde moment #2

11.40am
girl: hey, how long more we've got?
friend: still quite a bit of time. hey, liste to this. its pretty cool.
(both sit down to listen to friend's mp3)
11.50
girl: man, we still have like 10 mins.. wanna take a slow walk and check out the cip board before making our way to class?
friend: sure
11.57
(girl and friend are close enough to class to see that the whole class was already there)
girl: man our class sure is punctual today.
12.00
(girl and frind enter class)
tutor: Why are the both of you so late?
girl and friend: (both point to the clock at the same time and say pretty defensively) we're not late!
the class: class starts at 12.30!
girl and friend: oh.

well. it was kinda fun experiencing a day in the life of a blonde i guess.

2008-03-25T21:33:00.001+08:00

hurting again.

now i FEEL normal. =)

2008-03-23T22:36:00.002+08:00

you would expect a day which starts off with cheesecake from raffles for breakfast to be the best day ever.

well, was today the best day ever?

not exactly.
infact i dont think it was any kind of day.
it wasn gd.
it wasn bad.
its was kinda..
as a good friend of mine would put it..

'blah'

yeah, it was a 'blah' kinda day.

spent the day eating and doing lame stuff at home without using my brain much.
feel so under stimulated.
mayb i'm just too used to being this overloaded emotional tank that spills from almost every possible inch at every possible moment.
oh well.
i guess 'blah's better than having sadistic thoughts and exaggerated emotions and scaring my friends with being 'emo' all the time.

on the topic of being emotional. ('emo')
do i really look the 'emo' when i'm not talking or smiling?
cause alot of pepople have been telling me so.
i'm just doing my homework when someone says, "hey, why so 'emo'?"
or i'm just sitting in the cafe minding my own business when someone else comes up to me and says, "what you so 'emo' for?"
or even after lecture a friend could come up to me and say, " hey, noticed you look really 'emo' during lecture."

sometimes i hide my emotions so damn well i scare myself and sometimes i'm as easy to read as the hugest billboard ever.
man do i amaze myself sometimes.

anyways, on a lighter note, i cant wait to be sitting on the DBS Arts Centre on the 27th of March at 8pm!
finally gonna watch it!
i'm so excited!
i little bit too excited i think.
well, maybe thats cus i dont have anything else to be excited about.
oh man. i'm starting to sound really dreary again.
back to PILLOWMAN!
i'm getting so excited and expecting it to be really good which is scaring myself abit cus i dont wanna be disappointed. hate the feeling of disappointment. probably one of the worst feelings ever. okay, so harping on negative feelings dont exactly help the 'emo' image but hey, who likes being disappointed?

anyways, let me try this again..
on a LIGHTER note,
i'm finally gonna watch pillowman! (and with a good friend which is a big bonus!) and the cheesecake for breakfast this morning was pretty gd =)

life is GOOD.

P.S. Happy easter!

2008-03-17T23:29:00.002+08:00

got tickets to se Pillowman!
absolutely over the moon!
whee!
finally..
something to look forward too :)
just hope i wont get disappointed!

2008-03-09T22:03:00.002+08:00

confession : u and me happy together in lala land last night.

but hey, dreams are only for sorry souls no?

2008-03-03T21:01:00.002+08:00

thank you for being there when i needed you.
thank you for loving me, for making me feel like i ment something, like i was worth something.
thank you for helping me grow and understand myself better.
thank you for teaching me to love.

i loved you.
you loved me.
it was gd, its was beautiful.

ultimatley, no regrets. :]

alls gd now so pls dont feel bad.

2008-02-25T22:53:00.002+08:00

i cant believe it.
reality can really be hard to accept sometimes huh?
i thought i was doing a good job getting my life back on track.
who would've have known i would only conclude a few months later during one of my private 'reflection sessions' in my bedroom with myself that i've been in denial all this while?
it took me really long to accept this proposition but i guess i've kinda convinced myself i was meerly in denial.
i meerly pushed it all aside.
maybe i did deal with some issues but it wasn whole. it wasn the real deal.
i unconsciously numbed myself kinda.
but it's easier that way.
i know 'narrow road leads to hell' blah blah blah but i dont really care.
i just want to push everything aside and let time do the dirty work for me.
i dont wanna think so much.
ultimately, i dont wanna care.
but sadly, i cant. mayb i dont know how.
someone wanna teach me?
well, i'm gonna try again. and this time i'm aiming for complete liberation.
absolute freedom.

till den.

here's lyrics to a song i wrote pretty recently - Fantasy

i've dreamt of kissing you before
turning around to end my life
i've dreamt of cuddling up with you
before letting myself just die

i've dreamt of many ways to make
sure i never bother you again
but just dreaming of suicide wont help
cus i need to feel pain

[chorus]
so help me
kill me
and if you would
do it slowly
i promise
i'll be forever grateful
i'm broken
forsaken
so you know
it'll be easy
i promise
i'll be forever grateful

i've dreamt of us together again
and oh was it so lovely
but dreams are only for sorry souls
with no direction like me

[chorus] X2

just run me over
it will only take a minute
just run me over
it will only take a minute
just run me over
run me over
run me over
please run me over

2008-02-12T22:07:00.000+08:00

Fact or Opinion?

1) It's better to have loved and lost then to never have lost before
2) You're not ready to love others 'till you learn to love yourself
3) It's possible to someone too much

think about it.

2008-01-31T22:14:00.000+08:00

someone please.
just run me over.

2008-01-25T13:39:00.000+08:00

Saints' Cross Country (160108)

the pretty part of 03S13 :)

the lovelies

nice sky

what we get out off running our guts out.

2008-01-05T13:36:00.000+08:00

Miracle - Paramore

I've gone for too long

living like I'm not alive

So I'm going to start over tonight

Beginning with you and I

When this memory fades

I'm gonna make sure it's replaced

With chances taken

Hope embraced

And I have I told you

I'm not going

Cause I've been waiting for a miracle

And I'm not leaving

I won't let you

Let you give up on a miracle

When it might save you

We've learned to run from

Anything uncomfortable

We've tied our pain below

And no one ever has to know

That inside we're broken

I try to patch things up again

To calm my tears and kill these fears

But have I told you, have I?

I'm not going

Cause I've been waiting for a miracle

And I'm not leaving

I won't let you

Let you give up on a miracle

When it might save you

It's not faith if, if you use your eyes

Oh why

Get it right this time (this time)

Let's leave this all behind

Oh why

We'll get it right this time

It's not faith if you're using your eyes

Oh why

I've gone for too long

living like I'm not alive

So I'm going to start over tonight

Beginning with you and...

I don't want to run from

anything uncomfortable

I just want, no

I just need this pain to end right here

I'm not going

Cause I've been waiting for a miracle

And I'm not leaving

I won't let you

Let you give up on a miracle

Cause it might save you

Yeah, it might save you

Oh, it might save you

It's not faith if, if you use your eyes

If you use your eyes

faith

2008-01-01T13:57:00.000+08:00

YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL

When I see your smile

tears roll down my face

I can't replace.

And now that I'm strong I have figured out

how this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul,

and I know ill find deep inside me, I can be the one.

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all,

even if saving you sends me to heaven.

It's ok. it's ok. it's ok.

Seasons are changing and waves are crashing

and stars are falling all for us

days grow longer and nights grow shorter

I can show you I'll be the one.

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever.

I'll be there for you through it all,

even if saving you sends me to heaven.

Cause you're my

you're my

my true love

my whole heart

please don't throw that away.

Cause I'm here, for yo

please don't walk away

and please tell me you'll stay, stay...

Use me as you will

pull my strings just for a thrill

and I know ill be okay

though my skies are turning grey.

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

even if saving you sends me to heaven.

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

even if saving you sends me to heaven.

you made me cry.

2007-12-31T18:03:00.000+08:00

the end of the year is here.
so is the end of our relationship?
you've been avoiding me.
you've been avoiding me really deliberately.
you've been so cold.
why?
you've succeeded in leaving me clueless yet again.
why cant we just let time distant us slowly?
if you pull a sapling out prematurely and try to grow it somewhere else that friggin sapling is gonna DIE.
you cant just deposit the sapling anywhere you want to either cause it will DIE.
it will just figgin DIE.
i dont understand why u wanna rid yourself of this friendship of ours.
wasnt it gd?
wasnt it what you wanted?
to be just friends?
no strings attached.
no obligations.
freedom and space.
is that what you still want?
or do you now just wanna be acquaintances?
i definitely dont wanna see a friendship i cherish as much as ours to end just like that.
i friggin care for the friggin plant.
i friggin want it to live it life to the fullest.

damn me.

2007-12-15T21:43:00.000+08:00

my email got hacked so heres my new one : doritarded@live.com.sg

2007-08-12T21:42:00.000+08:00

a song i wrote today.

"i don't think i love you enough"

we were in love maybe to caught up in love
wanted to start a family
discussed our dream home and our dream car
even thought of name for the baby

(chorus)
that was how much i loved you
that was then when i thought
i know how much to love you
i seriously thought that i loved you enough

then one fine day i simply went wack
to think that i could do without you
i suggested that we go our seperate ways
all u re3ally said was 'ok'

i crumbled inside sorta wanted to die
but it seemeb to be what you wanted
so i put up a front built a fortress around me
but it all fell to bits for i couldnt breathe.

(chorus)

months passed and istill felt tortured inside
then i started to become a sucker for you
sat by my phone dreaming of your voice alone
clinging on to every 'goodbye'

(bridge)
it was a fruitless wait i figured
i was never good enough i discovered
you wanted me to change my hair, my clothes my talk
the signs were there i just chose to ignore

why did i feel like i was constantly crying
cuase i had loved you enough
i would understand i would be your best friend
guess i never did love you enough
i dont think i ever loved you enough.

not sure if you'd ever get to hear it.

2007-07-01T18:18:00.000+08:00

first wk of term 3 is over..

so fast!!
9 more wks to prelims..
gosh im scared.
so unprepared.
chem still got organic chem and macromolecules amath haven complete integration plus still got relative velocity or something like that.

well.

tmr is holiday!
yay!

its actully pretty much of a 'finish-overdue-hw holiday' kinda 'holiday'
hate that kind.

had swensens today.
apple crumble and topless 5.
'5 beauties presented topless for your pleasure'
that was what was written on the menu.

horny ice cream ppl.

seems like i've been eating everyday or every alternate day.
i've got to stop contributing to the icecream economy at my expense.

today was kinda happening but im pretty tired and lazy so

-the end-

2007-06-25T21:59:00.000+08:00

first day of term 3...

and we've got a half day! =)
yay!

cant believe we've passed out already.
so so so so fast.
im still in denial.
and i know zhising and xinning are too! haha.

prelims are 10 weeks away.
i cant believe how fast time flies.
gosh.

today was an interesting day
for some odd reason i felt like i was officially a sec4 now.
i feel old.
i dont wanna grow up.
i wanna stay young
worry about my weight
worry about my hair and how horrible its gonna look tmr (tmr's picture day)
worry about my grades
worry about homework
cause it sure beats worrying about a job interview or a driving test.

i am seriously in a state of denial.
im not ready to grow up yet.
oh well.

now i'll just have mugg hard for 'o's and hopefully get where i wanna go.
and i hope they'll be friends there with me =)

the grim future aside..

i've actually planned my post 'o's 'to do' list.
hees.
gives me stuff to look forward too.

i wanna:-
1) shop. (duh)
2) save money and visit a spa or have a massage
3) sign up for some classes at some cc or mayb clarke quay
4) get my butt off the couch and EXCERCISE
5) borrow alladin, little mermaid, jungle book, beauty and the beast, snow white, cinderella, lion king and other disney movies with perfect endings and fabulous sondtracks from back when i was yong and watch 'em over and over again.
6) catch up on movies i've missed during the year
*7) be more active in church
8) havent thought about it yet

bet my list will grow much longer by the time im done with 'o's. just hope i'll have enough energy left.

i'll shall start storing up my energy by ending my entry here today.

-the end-

p.s. sunflower sunflower sunflower woosh! i'll miss you guys much much. all of you guys. all guides work hard play hard!

-endure.explore.excel-

2007-05-05T20:22:00.000+08:00

i like flowers.
no.

i LOVE flowers.

get the picture?

oh yes. good luck to all who are having exams and are visiting blogs instead of studying.
orhor.. naughty naughty xD

hahas

btw. anyone know how too cure someone who stress eats?

2007-04-16T20:19:00.000+08:00

omg
omg
omg

today syarted out just like any other day:
1)rolled out of bed
2)had serious monday blues
3)knots started forming in my stomach at the thought of PE
4)and i basically dragged myself to scholl dreading the day ahead

well..
it was all boring and stuff like always untill..

during PE edmund pullsed up his shirt to wipe his face and exposed his abs (scream)
than titus did the same (scream scream)

that wasnt all too bad actually
the killer was ahen i saw this guy bathing in serangoon river

thats right
I SAW A MAN N A K E D BATHING IN A RIVER (scream X a zillion)

fortunately i was in 969 and well protected. if i had fainted at least there would have been ppl around but OMG
that guy muct be insane bathing in a river beside an expressway.

(couldnt take a picture cus the bus was kinda moving so thats to bad for you perverts out there)

the horror the horror

well something good came out of today.

xinning and i finally managed to get hold of the scrumptious chocolate toasts

yeah

now something serious.

i have realised how simlar my bro is compared to those children on super nanny though he is like much older
1)he has violent tendencies
2)simply immature
3)totally irritating
4)causes harm to sibling
5)does things behind my parents backs
6)is very tempremental
7)will drive you nuts any day of the week
8)detrimental to health
9)parents cant control him
10)depretly wants the world to revovle around him

poor him
poorer me.

on a lighter note..

2 more day before the phantom invades every space of my memory

yahoo

the anticipating is killing me
its wreching my guts out one by one
bit by bit

ouch

the phantom of the opera is here..
inside my mind..

standing on the edge of the world.
never felt so insecure.
bring me back.
i dont know how long more i can keep my balance.

2007-03-15T21:12:00.000+08:00

Last thin on my mind
(leann rimes & ronan keating)

Four o'clock in the morning
My mind's filled with a thousand thoughts of you
How you left without warning
But looking back i'm sure you tried to talk it through

Now I see it so clearly
We're together but living separate lives
So, I wanna tell you i'm sorry
Baby, I can't find the words

But, if I could
Then you know I would, yeah

No, I won't let go
Know what we can be
I wont watch my life crashing down on me
Guess I had it all right there before my eyes, yeah
Girl i'm sorry now we're the last thing on my mind

You carried me like a river
How far we've come still surprises me
Now, I look in the mirror (look in the mirror)
Staring back as the man I used to be with you
How I longed for you

No, I won't let go
Know what we can be
I wont watch my life crashing down on me
Guess I had it all right there before my eyes, yeah
Girl i'm sorry now we're the last thing on my mind

Girl I'm sorry I was wrong
Could've been there, should have been so strong
So, I'm sorryOh ohh wooohhhh ohhhhh

No, I won't let go
Know what we can beI wont watch my life crashing down on me
Guess I had it all right there before my eyes, yeah
Girl i'm sorry now (ooh, I'm sorry)
we're the last thing on my mind (on my mind)
I won't watch my life crashing down on me
Guess I had it all right there before my eyes, yeah
Girl i'm sorry now we're the last thing on my mind(On my mind) (on my mind)

i guess yeah.. i could sing it with you..
memories huh?

2007-03-09T17:45:00.000+08:00

school's out.

and the dreadfully busy 'hols' are about to start.

i hate the 'hols' espacially short ones

still feling kinda groggy. have ben feeling so for a while now so this post will end here.

its a dreadfully boring post isnt it?

2007-02-23T22:33:00.000+08:00

I Love Life

2007-02-20T10:25:00.000+08:00

why
why
why

i was dumb.
utterly dumb.
the dumbest i've ever been and it really seems like the end for me.

what am i to do?

i dont know how to live my life like that.
i dont know how to live my life without something as much a part of me as everything else added up together.

this feeling of exisitence
im not really here am i?
it dosen feel like im here.
i feel like a dream
i am nightmare

so it feels

feelings- complicated things arent they

i dont know what i feel now.

lost
stupid
non-exsistence
a longing like never before

twisted twisted love

love- it a whole other thing.
not just a feeling
a commitment you say?

well what happened then?

i was stupid. i admitted it

i want to do something about it

i'll do anything about it

im broken
messed up
a pile of rotting trash now

you

cool
calm
collected
even cold

the things you say

the things you do

im confused

and

unsatisfied.

have you realised?
its been a week now...

2007-02-15T21:24:00.000+08:00

so whats the status quo?

feeling utterly dumb

2007-02-12T19:29:00.000+08:00

went to wisma aft sch. hees:]
basically.
i feel really unproductive.
didnt get anything!!!!
arhs!!!

anyways.

something really interesting happened though.

we saw this guy sing to green tea bread!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so weird!!
but entertaining!
hahas.
oh.
if u guys were wondering what song he was singing,
it wasn the hot cross bun kind

it was a love song
something like "you are beautiful.. be mine.. "
sorta thing

hahas.
so funny!!

well. that would have to be the most exciting thing that has happened to me today.

continuing my search for clothes i like that i can afford...
its depressing when dey dont have it in your sixw our when it exceeds your puny budget.

2007-02-09T21:44:00.000+08:00

saturday is here!!!
yay!

anyways..

more imptly..

tuesday and wednesday are coming!!!

big YAY!

go figure

2007-02-03T12:11:00.000+08:00

he is a loser
irritating beyond compare
he is a ahole (i really dont want to use this word but im really angry. sorry)
far more than one can bare

if im to live
in the same house as him
for a decade more
my vessels will burst
and white hair will sprout
facing that stupid boar

beyond control
he'll frighten you
with his
outrageous teeth and nails
he'll torture you
its what he does best
and sadly you can bail

you'r stuck with him
no matter what
you cant throw him in the bin
turn around and kick his butt
but he'll just turn round and scream:
'mom, sis kicked me!'
you know then theres no way out for you
for who can win when its two against one
so just do what you have to do. (blog about it)

2007-02-01T21:29:00.000+08:00

im not supposed to be posting..
ssshhh..

anyways.
came online just to print some stuff for guides tmr but owells
a little post wont hurt right?

so let me start bt saying..
OMG! tomorrow got 2
2
2
biology test!!!
arhs!!
so weird right?
same sub to test on the same day.
mrs Lee say she cannot come tommorow so got 2 test lo.
i still dont get the logic why cant it be one big test instead of 2?

well, i dont seem to get the logic of many things recently.
the flu and mucus and all the sick stuff must be getting to my head.
speaking of sick
heres a shout out to my dear sister in guiding pk :
GET WELL SOON DARLING!!!

during chinese class got no pk so weird.
not so noisy anymore hahas.
den during chi class she always got something interesting to say.
hahas.
so girl listen up : you must get better and come back to school to entertin me!!
hahas

speaking of chinese..
i just rmb tmr got ting xie.

darn

i just had to rmb only now.
and obviously this means i didn bring home the book to study.
this always happens to me.
me and my sh"tty memory.
guess im gonna fail it again.
guess how many ting xie's i've actually passed.
chinese is just si difficult.
its not my fault.

one very impt thing:
I WANNA GO SHOPPING!!
i wanna cut my hair
i wanna buy shoes
i wanna buy flats
i wanna buy necklaces
i wanna buy bangles/bracelets
i wanna buy clothes ( i haven bought my new year clothes by the way so i have reason to do so. yipee!)
i wanna buy more and more of everthing listed above and more!!

hahas.
im making myself sound really materialistic.
i must say though, wordly wants arent everthing a girl needs to be happy.
they are strictly WANTS. not NEEDS.
yups.
i can control myself :)

so yes,
i've taken you through the bio test, pk, horribly difficult to learn chinese and my selfish wordly wishes-to-have only to lead you to the end of my post.
that is to say if you have actually read till the end.
so congratulations on the patience you indeeed must possess somewhere within you to do so but this is really

THE END

2007-01-28T23:26:00.000+08:00

social studies.

propaganda?

http://mysswebpage.blogspot.com/

2007-01-24T22:57:00.000+08:00

someone help me with my seriously fluctuating moods.

anyways.
my life hasnt been really interesting lately.
the new car arrived yesterday and i had the time of my life going to school today.
man, the car sickness.
who am i kidding.
it was absolutely horrible.
same me from the leather.
i probably only like leather when it comes to bags and stuff.
not car seats.
the smell..
man its like some car sickness catalyst.
anyways, the car is like this champagne colour and stuff. loks pretty spacious from the outside, is pretty ok from the inside.
oh it has mirrors not only in the front left seat but in the drivers seat too. plus they are like sliding mirriors.
duno how to explain but it's pretty cool la.
den the front seat actually got arm rest also. weird huh?
there are like many many many compartments all over the place. great place to play hide and seak.
oh.
plus u can like insert 12 cds at a time!
plus u can connect your mp3 and they actually have a power point in the car for you to like charge your phone or PDA and stuff alike. pretty cool huh.
maybe im just some car goondo but these are pretty new stuff to me.
its a pretty ok car.
seema pretty buly to me but yeah, besides the smell, its kinda nice.
actually..
i've been through pretty much lately but im pretty lazy to type em out so yeah. this is basically it. a entry about the new family car.

yay.

2007-01-19T21:15:00.000+08:00

i am a jealous pig.
someone pls hlp me.

2007-01-16T00:02:00.000+08:00

omg.

i
love
T R A V I S.

i miss him already.